Jerry's Favorite Christmas Cookie Recipe

So I've really been trying to lose some weight in anticipation of the holidays by watching my calorie and sugar intake... but the other day I was driving by a bakery and saw some tempting Christmas cookies.

I decided to pray about it: "Lord, if you want me to have some of those delicious cookies, let me find a parking place directly in front of the bakery."

And sure enough, the 8th time around the block, there it was!






I was so inspired that once I got home I dug out my old cookbook with my favorite cookie recipes marked from years gone by... I know it's been eons since I baked cookies, but since my Friday's are dedicated to Jerry think I'll make his favorite cookies in his honor... as I'm sure with my cooking skills that was one of the reasons he fell for me.. right?

While the sugar and dried fruit in it makes it not entirely ‘low carb kosher’ as you’ll see these ingredients will prove not to be problematic when it’s all said and done.... nevertheless I do promise that your husband too will love theses.. or at least love watching you make them.... better yet, make them together!!

Christmas Cookie Recipe (follow directions closely)
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
2 tsp lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequilla

Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer… Beat one cup of butter until fluffy in a large bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar… Beat again. At this point it’s best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup …just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor…

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a shpoon. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table… add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

Enjoy and Have a Mery Verry Chrishtmash…or shomefink